Johnson suggests these guidelines as a starting point for a family discussion:• Your parenting styles: are you firm but fair, strict or laid back? If you and your parents are poles apart how can you find some middle ground?
• Smacking or not? Do you believe in physical punishments, or not? If not, what are the consequences if your child misbehaves?
• Are boundaries applied right across the board? For example, if you have said no TV today, does that mean none at the grandparents as well?
• How much television is allowed? For example, you may allow your child to watch TV only after they have done all their homework.
• What rewards do you give for good behaviour?
• What bedtimes do you want for your child? Can they stay up later if there is no school the following day?
• What is your policy on sweets and other treats?
• What is your policy on food? Are you a stickler for healthy food all of the time, or can you be flexible if your children are eating elsewhere?
• Do grandparents understand if your child isn’t allowed certain foods for medical reasons? Are they tempted to offer them ‘just a small amount’ of something they should not be eating, as a treat, without realising the consequences?
Grandparents and your extended family can be a huge help, but honest communication in advance is essential if you are both to get the best out of it, and not end up with a child who is confused by conflicting boundaries.
- Please see the full article here: http://www.parentdish.co.uk/family/are-grandparents-always-the-help-you-want-them-to-be/